A Little Boy’s Love and Hate


Think of the times you read about Daejang pushing and dragging Eun Soo, and the times he carried her like a parcel or how he lifted her by her collar…

I remember a lesson from Psychology 101, from my college days which can be applied to the immature behavior exhibited by our dear Daejang.

Lesson X  Pschology 101…

This seemingly cold behavior (or heated behavior if you wanted to put it that way) of Daejang directed towards Eun Soo is quite natural and common.  Little boys usually do not like to play with little girls, that is, when they are still little.  Daejang was a hard man, he had to be, he was a warrior.  Though he was rough, he was still very cool.  Cool he might have been, he was hopelessly immature.  He considered girls to be bothersome.  Indeed, the girl specimen that this little boy met had a lot of tears, and unusually large quantities of it which rolled down her cheeks just about any time and anywhere.  Not only did she cry a lot, she could not run fast and no matter how you talk to her, she could not understand a word he was trying to say, and he was a ‘man’ with very few words to begin with, so he thought her most troublesome.

And this troublesome weakling that he’d call a girl dared to look down on him, who was a very important, proud and respected daejang that could not be ignored back in Goryreo.  He must have been very hurt.  His first girlfriend was a fellow classmate who flogged a leather whip in a most formidable way and looked more like a warrior comrade than a girlfriend.

When this little boy wanted a particular girl’s attention and if his efforts were in vain, most often, he would lose his temper, get really frustrated and bully the girl.  Instead of directing positive behavior at the girl, he subconsciously directed his negative feelings towards her out of being slighted or ignored.

Though he acted like a child, he was nonetheless a man.  So a cool guy like him would unwittingly haul her like parcel over the shoulder, push her, pull her by the collar and drag her along … and he did it quite naturally.  A little bit of bullying, not so much as outright vengeful feelings as a result of being neglected.

The dilemma explained …

The dilemma is that on one hand he was immature like a normal little boy, on the other hand he was actually a grown man.   Because he was childish and inexperienced in this respect, he was drawn to this girl who was very intriguing, looking shiny or bling, bling as we would say nowadays.  He was smitten to falling in love at first sight without knowing it.  He became anxious, not knowing what to do with the overwhelming feelings all rushing into his heart all of a sudden.  He might have wondered why he still wanted to look at her, to notice her capability, her hair, her sweet-smelling scent … to him, this was quite a blow, for he could not understand why he would throw a fit at her, push and drag her and why she confused him.

Back to the Realm of the Earth that he knew well, he felt more at ease.  The familiar context and environment put him back to where he belonged, within the confines of his nobleman stature, his warrior code and the rules of society.  Now that he had the opportunity to get to know her, he had gradually distanced himself from her.

It did not take long for the childish and impatient little boy or should I say the strong sense of masculine pride to emerge from within him from time to time, so he was constantly in a dilemma, in being drawn to the girl, he pushed her away and in caring much for her, he became rude to her.

The dilemma was perplexing him.  When he saw her walking about, baring her thighs, he was afraid, but he also felt that she was troublesome, so he wanted to yell at her.  Because he had been in close contact with her many times before, nothing closer than hugging her closely to keep her from harm or from getting away, or lost when he had first met her to get through the rough and ready trip of time traveling, without thinking much about it, he naturally went straight up to her, pressing her to back into a column to yell at her, as if this is out of habit already.

He would only understand his own heart much later.  Only when he realized that he had fallen in love with her would this dilemma dissipate, and that was when he would grow up.  When he became aware of this dilemma, the code of being a nobleman and the rules of society would again apply and he would become wary of his close physical contact with the girl and the consequences of the actions he had taken upon her.

I have been thinking too much.  (All because of you, dear readers who wanted a second run and consequently having to think about what I have translated  a few more times.)  The original story and drama would not have been this complicated and included so many trivial and excessive theories of – WHY DJ likes ES!

 

 

 

 

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4 Responses to A Little Boy’s Love and Hate

  1. darcydevenus says:

    amen amen!!! I agree with the other comments! I’m not a psychologist, and I live to hear the theories which explain things like that. It’s a way that i’d never thought about before. Thanks again for the amazingness of your work!!!! I must say, it’s wierd thinking about the grotto… especially as I have actually been there. What’s crazier, is that, CY would have known it too… the site is very old. He was a travelled and knowledgable man. He would have known where he was…. for both buddah statues. It’s mindblowing!!!!! Thanks!

  2. skpollen says:

    Love the insight! I so wanna applaud right now. XD

  3. Maria says:

    wow thank you for your detailed explanation! but i have a question if you dont mind me asking……….. if his first love was only infatuation, why did daejung slept for 7 years after her death? was it because he lost the love of his life or was it because he found his life meaningless?
    And in the lake where we see our daejung and his father fishing…and his father asks ” is she still in there?” and our daejung answers ‘ she is in there’ ? what do you make of it? it happened after he met Eun Soo. This part is quite confusing! when actually did daejung fall for eun soo is just quite hard to pin point!

    Thanks again for ur lovely work!!! ❤

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